“It’s like, haha, boobie, ya got me” said one Blue Footed Booby who is particularly sick of the jokes made at his species expense. “Don’t get me wrong, I like jokes as much as the next bird, but would it kill you to look past my name every once in a while?” said the Booby, “There’s plenty of other things you can make fun of about me: I’m disorganized, I can’t dance. Why not pick something like that?”
It’s a growing trend that has been gaining traction within the Boobie Community. Activists have started calling for an official species name change, from “Blue Footed Boobie” to “Turquoise Limbed Bosoms”. Some claim it would help draw attention from the bird’s name, and shine a light on other more meaningful aspects of the species.
“I’ll be honest with you, boobie is a funny word. But I think as a society we’re a little better than that. And we’re all missing a big part of this, we have blue feet. Isn’t that way sillier than the boobie part? I mean look at these things.”
While the trend may be on the rise within the Boobie community, other bird species have firmly stated their opposition towards it.
“No they’re boobies” said one penguin during an interview. “What’s the big deal anyway? Birds don’t even have boobies so it doesn’t mean anything. Besides you think I like being called “a penguin” all the time? My name is Jake. But you don’t see me trying to get all of us renamed do ya?”
In another interview, a goose had a slightly different perspective on whether or not the bird community is ready for the change.
“If they don’t have to be boobies anymore then we shouldn’t have to be called geese.” said the goose. “I think we should be called “Black-Headed Honking Shitting Assholes” because I think that highlights all of our community’s best qualities”
An informal meeting of bird species is to be held this Wednesday in the place with the most food to steal and largest collection of people to shit on.
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