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Among Worker Shortage, UW Dining Puts Carson’s Cockroaches To Work

It’s no secret that the dining halls on campus have been struggling recently. With low pay and benefits, UW Dining has been struggling to hire and keep talent. This has led to long wait times, food shortages, and overall a lot of angry freshmen. However, this might all change soon with UW Dining’s new plan announced today.

The infamous cockroaches of Carson Gulley Market have now been hired as fully fledged UW Dining employees. Thanks to the sheer number of roaches currently occupying Carson’s, they’re able to run the dining hall all by themselves. In addition, their willingness to work for (food) scraps, has freed up resources and workers for dining halls residents actually care about, like the slightly less disgusting Four Lakes and Gordon’s.

Tripp Resident, Lucas Pittman says he and his friends are fans of the change. “We already knew the roaches were there, so as long as it means I don’t have to wait 20 minutes for a slice of pizza, I don’t really care.”

UW Housing and Dining director Jeff Novak has high hopes that this pilot program will expand further.

“Our Lakeshore buildings have a great supply of bugs that I believe we can put to work. We’ve partnered with the Entomology department to start training the thousands of flies in Kronshage to take the trash out and the spiders in Waters to start cleaning the bathrooms.”

He hopes the rest of UW Housing and Dining will be able to switch to a full bug staff by this time next year.


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