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“I agree, Honey. This halftime show is a bit much,” Says Man with Firm Erection

On February 2, 2020 Super Bowl LIV shook the world. Many have gone so far as to rate this game as one of the greatest Super Bowls of all time. Likewise, many are saying that the Super Bowl Halftime performance featuring Jennifer Lopez and Shakira was one of the greatest. However, some men seem to be saying this due to their obsession with the kind of provocative dancing featured in this performance. This seems to be the case for happily married man Chet Lawrence.

“It seems like year after year more body parts are shown and more body parts are shakin, it’s getting harder and harder to behave myself in front of the wife. No pun intended of course” said Lawrence.

Lawrence has gotten in trouble with his wife before and wasn’t interested in repeating history. But as the performance went on, it became increasingly more difficult for Lawrence to contain his bodily instincts.

“Yeah, you got me. I got a boner, a pretty decent one if I do say so myself. I did reassure my wife that the show was quite risque. I didn’t want to have another ‘Janet Jackson boob fiasco’. said Lawrence.

Lawrence continued to hide his hard shlong as the show went on. Unfortunately, the show’s grand finale is what pushed him from a field goal to a touchdown. In other words, Lawrence had pitched a tent. After talking with Mr. Lawrence, we were able to hear Mrs. Lawrence’s side of the story.

“That pig, every year this happens. It is one of the most gross, embarrassing things I’ve ever had to endure. I don’t know, maybe I’ll just stop inviting my parents.”


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