Tanner Collin is in many regards a perfectly normal college junior here at UW Madison. He studies hard, parties hard, and he lives for Badger football. But he also has a secret, one that puts him at odds with many members of his community and makes him a constant victim of systemic oppression. What is his secret? Tanner is a registered Republican.
“A lot of people don’t know what it’s like to be different,” Tanner told us in an interview. “They don't know what it’s like for people to assume things about them, make them a stereotype. They can't possibly understand what it's like for people to look at you differently just because you support a party and president that “allegedly” gave forced hysterectomies to migrants.”
As explained by Tanner, his day to day life isn’t easy, but yesterday he had an especially triggering experience.
In his economics lecture, Tanner’s professor was explaining how immigration is a net positive for a country’s economy.
Tanner was drawn aback, and quite frankly offended. He heard just about enough of this leftist nonsense.
“Excuse me professor, but isn't it true that immigration can also be bad? I mean a lot of bad people come from Mexico. And I don’t mean that in a racist way, just that it’s a dump of a country. Again, that’s not racist. It wasn't that long ago that long ago that President Trump stopped the murderous caravan of political refugees from storming our towns and cities. And they were from Honduras, or as I like to call it, small Mexico.”
The professor, who shall remain nameless, stayed silent for a few seconds, not certain she had heard Tanner correctly, before saying, “Uh…. let's table that conversation for the discussion section.”
Tanner was disappointed that his professor refused to answer his clearly loaded question with facts and logic, but then again, what can be expected from the haven of radicalism that is the American university?
In any case, Tanner already knew he was correct. His professor was a woman, and Tanner would sooner give his father’s employees a living wage than admit defeat to a pair of tits.