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Thousands Gather for Hot Chocolate and Death of Lady Liberty

Everyone will remember where they were. This sinister day will haunt Madison residents for decades to come. Thousands congregated for a day of merriment at the Winter Carnival, enjoying budget-friendly music, snowflake-making, and playing God by walking on ice. Despite the joyous activities, nobody could have predicted what would ensue.

“I came for the hot chocolate and snowpeople, when suddenly I realized Lady Liberty had no accessible airways exposed. We were killing her and there was nothing I could do,” said Melissa Mellum, mother of triplets.

As dogs were playing fetch and children were making snow angels, Lady Liberty had no way to scream for help. She couldn’t breathe, and she couldn’t protect our nation's democracy.

“What was I supposed to do? Dig into the ice and push her out with my two bare hands?” said Becky Blank as she was interrogated for the murder.

As the FBI searches for a single culprit, we all should look inside and accept that it was all of us who killed our nation’s most prominent symbol of freedom. We must ask ourselves “What next? Kill all the bald eagles?”


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