When temperatures start to get warmer in Madison, most people look forward to eating on the Terrace and doing homework on Bascom Hill. Not Craig. The only thing Craig has thought about since the first snow of the season is his Chacos. And now, it’s time.
He has been workshopping his announcement photo for nearly three months now, planning a message that carries equal parts nonchalance and blatant superiority. When the weather finally hit the right temperature, Craig decided to make his move.
His unwitting 163 Instagram followers were just about moved to tears by a picture on Craig’s story that featured a picture of his blindingly-white feet encased in the comforting straps of his special edition Chacos. With a little caption “You know what season it is!” in the hard-to-read cursive font, all of his friends and acquaintances had no choice but to envy him.
When the temperatures dipped back down to freezing, however, his conviction was tested. Even in the below-freezing temperatures, Craig had to prove to his peers that he was brave. While everyone else brought back quirky Target socks and boots, Craig was still wearing his Chacos loud and proud.
“I mean, I wouldn’t really call myself a hero,” said Craig through chattering teeth. “I just don’t want my fans to lose faith in me, ya know?”