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Student Finishes Complaining About Midterms Just in Time to Complain About Finals



Following a complaint filled midterm season, reports are indicating that Sophomore Michael Farrow recovered just in time to complain about stress from finals. Farrow’s peers have expressed bewilderment at the “raw endurance” required to complain for so long with barely any break.


“It started out small,” said classmate Amanda Mulligan. “I heard him whisper ‘fuck’ after he turned pages in his textbook. Later, I asked him ‘how’s it going?’ and he said ‘It’s going’.”


“I wasn’t sure how long he’d be complaining about midterms after he finished,” said girlfriend Amy Nunes. “I’m proud of him for living in constant fear of making future mistakes rather than dwelling on past mistakes.”


“I wish I could complain with such consistency,” said roommate Mike Krall. “I can only manage to eek out two ‘Are you kidding me?’s before I burn out.”


Analysts are unsure how long Farrow could keep complaining, but some speculate he could ease his complaints about finals into complaints about coming back for spring semester.

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