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“It’s not due until April,” Says Student Slowly Realizing It’s April

Amanda Gibson was on a routine walk to class this morning with her friend Sacha Marks when she received a phone call from her mother. Being the good daughter she is, Gibson halted her conversation with Marks and chatted with her mom for a couple minutes until he couldn’t bear listening to her shrill voice any longer.

“She really wanted to FaceTime me later tonight, and I kept trying to tell her that I was already going to UU trivia with the crew and I couldn’t get out of it,” Gibson said. “And then she tried to remind me that I’ve got a Russian Lit paper to write and I told her, it’s not due until April, like hop off my dick mom. I know how to manage my own time.”

Throughout the day, Gibson’s mom’s comment about the paper started to weigh on Gibson. It was around noon when she sensed something was seriously off. Gibson began to mentally sort through some information she couldn’t get off her mind. It was 55 degrees outside; Gibson had only put on a light jacket that morning. She also had plans to attend a Darty at her boyfriend’s frat the upcoming weekend.

On top of all that, her nose was itchy, which only happens when pollen is in the air. Multiple witnesses have reported that Gibson’s a total bitch about her allergies in the springtime.

It was promptly after a big sneeze that Gibson realized that it was, in fact, April.

“Fuck,” commented Gibson.

Plans for UU trivia have since been cancelled, and Gibson has stated that she intends on FaceTiming her mom to apologize.

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