UW Sororities Trade Cabo and Fort Lauderdale for New Viral Destinations This Spring Break: Measles, Gonorrhea, & Syphilis

Tired of the basic beaches of Fort Lauderdale and the overcrowded resorts of Cabo, UW-Madison sororities have officially announced their Spring Break 2026 destinations. This year, they’re being bold, traveling to some of the newest, most viral destinations they’ve heard about, likely through TikTok. These vacation spots include new exotic locations such as Measles, Gonorrhea, and Syphilis, all with their own fun-filled activities, vibrant nightlife, and unique experiences that leave you with life-long souvenirs.

“Everybody goes to Tulum, it’s just like so 2025,” said Sadie Green, social chair for Alpha Delta Phi. “We wanted to go somewhere new, somewhere that really stays with you, you know? That’s why we’re going to take our two-week spring break vacation in Syphilis!"

According to “travel influencers” within the Greek Life community on campus, Syphilis (often confused with an island nation off the coast of Spain) is the ultimate travel destination.“Everything I’ve read about Syphilis says a painless sore is the main attraction, but that’s probably just some edgy, minimalist art installation at the pier,” Green explained, pronouncing Syphilis as “Scifiless”. When we attempted to correct her, she corrected us, assuring us that her parents had taken numerous trips there when she was growing up, and that she knew how to say it. “It’s almost like a Mediterranean noir vibe mixed with a spiritual crisis, but once you get to the late stage of your trip, the locals say it can make you lose your mind. And to be honest, after midterms, a mental breakdown is exactly what we need. It feels very White Lotus,” Green said as she showed us her Pinterest board titled "ADPhi Takes on Syphilis”  filled with vintage penicillin ads and promotional material helping to prevent the spread of Syphilis. 

Not to be outdone, Kappa Gamma Nu has opted instead to travel to the rustic, meadow-spotted countryside charm of Méasles, a region they believe is nestled somewhere in the French Riviera.

“It’s known for that incredibly ‘dotted’ aesthetic,” explained Mackenzie Scott, social chair for Kappa Gamma Nu, as she showed off her mood board of red polka-dot bikinis. “All the influencers say that within a week of getting there, you get this sort of full-body glow, almost like a rash mixed with a tan, but it’s like, high fashion? It’s very European chic. There’s even this exclusive lounge called Koplik, I think it’s a pop-up club? Apparently, everyone there has cute little white spots in their mouth from drinking too much.”

When we asked further about the high fever that is typically associated with the ‘region’, Scott sighed. “That’s just, like, the heat of the Mediterranean and stuff. If you weren’t sweating, were you even in Europe?” When we asked Mackenzie what she thought about the Measles outbreak that was currently happening all across the country (and in Madison) due to HHS Secretary RFK Jr’s policies, she replied, “I thought voting for Trump was like pro-getting rid of immigrants. Why would they be letting them in?” 

However, for those looking to stay a little closer to home this break, Chi Psi Phi is en route to the bustling, high-energy port of Gonnorhea, allegedly located just north of the Bahamas.

“The name is just so musical, isn’t it? It gives me this feeling of tanning in the sun and relaxing by the beach with my girls,” said Chloe Williams, the social chair for Chi Psi Phi. “Our travel agent, who we found through TikTok DMs, said it’s famous for its ‘burning sensation’. I just assume that’s like the local spice, or maybe there’s really intense pilates classes at the resort.”

Chloe is also looking forward to the island’s famous “discharge” ceremony. “Apparently, it’s like a celebrity send-off at the airport, like a parade of fluids? Maybe they spray us with water or something? It sounds messy, but so authentic. We’re bringing extra tissues just in case all the locals are sad we’re leaving.”

Despite repeated warnings from University Health Services, which the sororities have dismissed as “gatekeeping” and “bad vibes”, the Greek Life community is ready to throw caution to the wind, let loose, and party with the locals.

“We just want a unique opportunity we haven’t experienced before, you know? We don’t care about photos or new clothes or stuff like that. ” Chloe insisted as she packed her suitcase. “We want to bring something memorable back to campus this spring. Something that really proves we were there. Something that we can share with everyone so they can experience the culture too.”

So, whether you’re off to sunbathe on the sandy beaches of Syphilis or admire the rolling hills of Méasles, the result is the same: returning to Madison more tan, a little poorer, and with a little less light left in your eyes as you count down the days to graduation. But no matter what, we know for certain that Spring Break 2026 will be infectious. UHS may call it a “public health crisis”, but in Greek life, that’s just the price to pay to stay relevant. Through it all, the UW-Madison sororities show us that the best vacations aren’t just about where you go, they’re about what you’re willing to spread when you get home.